I realize that it is a somewhat frightening experience for the man who has just learnt that his girlfriends have found out, from his mistress, about his wife. A man in such a situation can only beg, grovel, or secretly cross the country border on a desert mule if he is to get out alive of the situation. We all know, ‘Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned’… so imagine the scenario when there’s more than one woman involved. Poor fellow… he literally doesn’t know what hit him… [A lot of stilettos and Chanel bags are being flung at him, it’s hard to tell.]

“I’m not a womanizer… its complicated.” he retorts to a friendly ear listening to his honest plea. And though he might seem like a common house rodent to all others, the ‘friendly ear’ has a mind of its own.

Monogamy is a tricky subject because on either side of this great divide is a judgmental crowd. And of course, I’m part of the tiny group of people who stand on the ‘frown-worthy’ side of this line. Because, hey… I don’t understand the compulsive need that people have to ‘commit’ and be ‘committed to’.

When my little munchkin of a niece declared her love to her “boyfriend” after their 7^th phone call… she was sure that he was ‘the one’. I was skeptical and she kept wondering why? “He said he loves me too… ” she quipped with glee. I nodded in a supportive way to this silly misunderstanding, but since she seemed utterly devoted, I didn’t deal out any other discourse. Needless to say, she’s been in and out of love since then and every time she remains positive that she’s found her soul mate.

So, maybe it’s because people like to believe in this warped fantasy created by the movie mafia, which assaults us with cotton candy and pixie horses flying through tufts of white clouds. Or maybe it’s just the compulsion to believe that destiny has allotted some poor bugger to be your soul mate and that destiny will take care of everything that you should be taking care of yourself.

Truth is under the guise of monogamy it is often the case that one part of the couple begins to control the other. And it is more often the case that the second half decides to revolt by getting involved with someone else.

Lead us not into temptation? Yea right! Just when you’re in that sticky patch in your relationship when you’re otherwise petite girlfriend is becoming the cause of your recurring nightmares, your high school sweetheart rings your doorbell, looking dangerously gorgeous, obviously, and invites herself, over for a cup of coffee. Needless to say, your ‘my girlfriend is my soul mate’ theory begins to waver a little. What if you were supposed to end up with this gorgeous vision seated in front of you with her silky smooth legs perfectly crossed? You can hardly deny destiny, when it’s trying to set things right and yet there’s a voice in the back of your mind that tells you not to do anything stupid [the voice of your girlfriend, of course].

Ok, so you resign yourself into not making a move, because you’re committed and “exclusive”. And suddenly your ex breaks into beautiful soft tears about how she actually misses you and wants you back. And all the voices in your mind are getting distant and foggy. And there it is… you’ve unwontedly plunged into the dark circles of hell.

And surely this has happened with well meaning women too. You claim to have had better self-control… but in your mind maybe you didn’t want to control yourself. Who can tell?

Certainly not me… I’m no Dr Phil. But on a purely Good-Samaritan basis I would like to proclaim to everyone to not take life so seriously. Live and let live. There are enough twits in this world to match your personality type. So don’t pine, don’t crib… don’t hold on so tight that it gets hard to breathe. Monogamy isn’t even biologically supported. So stop feeling bad about the ’scumbag’. Sometimes people are not meant to last forever. Enjoy the time you have with them and when the time comes, just let go.

I mean, surely, the mule population would appreciate a good break…